Mining your own business.
Have you ever felt that you’re sitting on a gold mine? Like, literally sitting on a gold mine? Well, then you're in luck! Follow Smart Cocktail’s official guide on how to turn your backyard into a solid cash cow with a little help from our friends at Atlas Copco.
First we recommend putting up a notice in your neighborhood about your grand plans. Done? Good, now let's figure out the shape and type of your treasure by doing some core drilling. Shoot through your garden about 2–3 kilometers in different directions. Let’s hope for a huge blob of iron ore so that we can use the block caving method!
-Expect a lot of this...
Now it’s time to put the showel in the ground. Start by making a service tunnel for the stuff you need to drive down later, aim for just about 800 meters under your kids former trampoline. This will take about three years of work. Also write a reminder to call the folks at Atlas Copco to figure out how much fresh air needed to breath down there, they can do the math for you.
This part might be a bit boring, but trust us, it will pay off big time when the actual mining is done automagically. Dig a pattern of tunnels right underneath the iron body. Then make a second tunnel directly underneath the first one otherwise you won't be able to set up the explosives correctly. Confused? Don't be… it will all be explained in step 4!
The two-story tunnel network will serve a very specific purpose. After blasting the top roof with high explosives, a void is created making the entire core fall down nicely bit by bit into our blasted tunnel. You can't argue with gravity!
Example: Let’s say we want all of the letters from above to start falling down here. We would then mine funnels (or draw bells if you want the correct lingo) to Step 4 and detonate! Everything written would fall down letter by letter like a giant Tetris game to be transported to the crusher!
At last we are getting to the part about bringing the good stuff up into the garden. At Smart Cocktail we would recommend trading your car, and then some, to get a top-of-the-line-mean-machine like the ST14 Mine loader. This baby can even be remote controlled to transport all of your valuables to the crusher where bit by bit are sent by the conveyor belt and elevator all the way to the sunny top.
-This used to be such a nice neighborhood!
We’re sorry for mentioning this at the very end, but remember the void? Well, that void will likely take your house (and probably the whole neighborhood) a few hundred meters down a huge hole in the ground. But rest assured, all that green for years to come will fend off the most ill-willed person. And hey! This will bring the lot of you closer together and isn't that what life is all about?
What are you waiting for? Let's start digging!